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Can you answer this question by creating an entertaining little tale that includes these phrases?
1) It was either the man from UNCLE or Wyatt Earp!
2) That is QUITE allot of __________!!!
3) I'll take two of each...and make it snappy!
4) Don't make me_______
5) "We are like two ships that________....."
6) Please!! put that gun away!
Dodge City, Kansas
Circa 1875
"United Network of Cowboy Lawbreaking Echelon"
The cowboy at the bar of the Longbranch Saloon slapped down some coins as he ordered a Singapore Sling and a Brandy Alexander:"3) I'll take two of each...and make it snappy!"
Miss Kitty,proprietor of the Longbranch, cozied on over to the cowboy who was loaded with money.
Miss Kitty:" Care to buy a lady a drink?"
Cowboy: "Don't mind if I do." He asked Sunshine what she would like and totally ignored Kitty.
Miss Kitty seethed as Sunshine, (the woman who had won Matt's heart), accepted the cowboy's offer.
Cowboy : " Now......As I was saying.....1) It was either the man from UNCLE or Wyatt Earp! I jeeeeest cain't remember which." He took another sip of his beer.
Miss Kitty: "Man from UNCLE??!!! What the hell are you jabbering about?!"
The Cowboy curled his moustache as he looked her up and down:" You know...... United Network of Cowboy Lawbreaking Echelon.....But.....HIC.....the more I think of it....the more I think it was ol' Wyatt, himself.........but....welll.......maybe it WAS ......"
Sunshine : "It was NOT the cowboy fom what's it's name OR Wyatt. It was U.S. Marshal Matt Dillon........HE'S the one that captured Billy Bob Bosheffski....
And he's MY boyfriend!" Sunshine smiled as she ate the cherry fom her drink.....stem and all.
Cowboy:" 2) That is QUITE alot of shouting, little missy!!! You sure you have your facts straight?"
Kitty:" If you converse with this moron long enough, you'll soon find out that NOTHING about her is straight.....She's as crooked and deviant as........."
Matt strolled into the room and caught Kitty's attention.
Matt's eyes narrowed as he watched the cowboy's hand rest on Sunshine's shoulder:" 4) Don't make me break every bone in your body. Kindly GET your hand off my girl"
Kitty winced, realizing that Matt had NEVER displayed this type of emotion for her.
The cowboy turned to face Matt.
Kitty:" 6) Please!! put that gun away! All of the furniture you see around you was just delivered last week. And that mirror came all the way from St. Louis. It cost me a small fortune and ......."
((( B A N G ! B A N G ! )))
The mirror behind the bar was shattered as the cowboy's gun flew out of his hand, due to a crackshot by Matt.
Sunshine took one final gulp of her drink as she smiled with pride at he marksmanship of her boyfriend.
Miss Kitty removed some slivers of glass from her
left cheek:"Matt?"
He turned to face her.
Kitty:" 5) "We are like two ships that pass in the night....and DAY, anymore. Why don't we let this cowboy and Sunshine go on drinking.....And you and I mosey on over to the corner table...."
Matt tipped his hat in her direction and returned his gaze to Sunshine.
Sunshine, imitating Kitty:" Ooooooooh, Matt. Why don't you and I mosey on over to your office?"
Matt grinned:" Cell # 3?"
Sunshine took one last gulp and grabbed his massive arm.
As they strolled out of the saloon, a distraught Miss Kitty was still removing fragments of the mirror from her face.
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THE MAN FROM UNCLE Season One Long Opening
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